fork in the road

“It might be a quarter-life crisis
Or just the stirring in my soul…”

~John Mayer

When I was the driver’s seat of my twenties looking down the road, I wasn’t always sure of what lay ahead. To be honest, I really didn’t have a clue. I think Steve Jobs said it best: “…you can’t connect the dots looking forward; you can only connect them looking backwards.”

But as I traveled down that road – fumbling to make sense of the journey and feeling intimidated, unsure, and frustrated – I discovered a key to mentally flip the situation from impending crisis to unlikely opportunity.

So here’s an extension of the Steve Job’s theorem that I’d like to offer you: if you can’t connect the dots looking forward, then don’t overly invest in any particular outcome. Why not set your expectations at “neutral” and practice accepting alternative outcomes in life? Be open. Life is full of possibility. Approach life like the real-time, ultimate treasure hunt it is.

Here’s how the chips fell for me: When I was in my early 20s, I was offered an incredible once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to do volunteer outreach and training work in Australia. How could I pass up an opportunity like that?! With no real discernible skills – I had just dropped out of my degree program – but a lot of enthusiasm, I was bound for the Land Down Under. That decision to be open to whatever came along brought complete liberation and sheer adventure. But not without a healthy dose of self-doubt and a sharp deep breath.

I was leaving behind almost two years of pre-med courses where I earned Dean’s List grades and a forward looking commitment to go to medical school. From that perspective, my future was seriously locked in, for say, the next 10 years. And I had mentally written in all the compulsory filler around a medical degree, like a handsome husband and 4 beautiful kids, a house in the suburbs, and European vacations. It was all very neat and defined. And not a lot of fun because it was somebody else’s idea of what I should do with my life.

Needless to say, that volunteer experience in Australia transformed my life in ways I would have never expected. First of all, I had no idea how much I’d love facilitating training events. I learned to wind surf and snorkel and met so many fascinating people from around the world. Oh, and I randomly stumbled upon my true calling in life – helping others transform their lives through personal growth and life-long learning.

Two years later I returned to the U.S. to embark on a fulfilling career in learning & development that has taken me all over the world plus empowered me to discover and follow my own dream to make a difference in the world. All while enjoying my life, but more importantly, being true to myself. Echoing the insightful lyrics of John Mayer, I’m glad I paid attention to the stirring in my soul. Crisis averted.

Truth be told: The world is your oyster. Where do you go from here?

Editor’s note: This post was orginally published in the Young Professionals blog on Life Meets Work.

Related post: Is it scary enough?