Oh ya! Honestly. Life tastes soooo good. At least for me: That’s my life these days. It’s about time I let you in on the haps.
Well, you know I’m rockin’ a new life these days and it’s all about immersing in the experience of the *now*. Right now. In this very moment, I’m curious: what’s going on in your head and how are you flowing with it?
It’s certainly no secret. The majority of us live in our heads to one degree or another. Me, particularly. I’ve always lead a full, rich cerebral life. Streams of consciousness, entire conversations, detailed scenarios, and intricate analyses unfold with great ease within the confines of my delicate gray matter. At times, I can readily articulate the vastness of what lies therein. Other times, I’m at a total loss and can easily find external mediums – like music – to convey deep emotion or emerging feelings.
Paradoxically, I can be too close to my own intimacy – my desire for deep human connection. My own or that of others. Often this leaves me with a healthy fear of treading even closer or lingering too long in this space. As a female – not to sound gender-biased – I’m probably on the low end of the emotional display scale. I don’t cry easily. Not too much ruffles my feathers. I’m easy-going. You know, laid back. All in all, as most everyone who knows me well would attest: I’m a pretty balanced individual.
So it totally caught me off guard when I relocated to Phoenix in the last week and found myself strapped into an emotional rollercoaster. Let’s face it. Moving sucks. And as tears were streaming down my face, I thought to myself: Why am I doing this YET AGAIN. I’ve been there. Done that. However, I’d much rather: Be here. Doing this. (kudos, Benjy, for this fabulous expression!!!) And this is precisely the point. We – as humans – are subject to a myriad of feelings. Emotions. This is the domain of the right brain and they’re pretty reliable signals. (Left brainers, critical thinkers, hard scientists, etcetera…feel free to argue this point.) I, on the other hand, have – albeit reluctantly – learned to heed their beck & call as an awakening. Their message can be subtle but powerful. When they rear their head, I remind myself to take a deep breath and consider my perspective. Fortunately, the Universe – by a way of a good friend – came to my rescue this week…
So over the past few months, I’ve been immersing myself in feeling my feelings, listening to my body, leaning into the fear…or whatever has bubbled up. It bolsters my already striking confidence. I have felt the dichotomy of feeling both powerful and helpless/fearful. Like a perpetual see-saw, tilting back & forth between these two spaces. Yet, I resoundingly hear the ring of my father’s words in my ear: “This too shall pass.” Yes, I know the truth of these words as I have experienced time & time again.
Look. There’s a magic to what goes on inside of you. You just have to tap into it…and not be afraid to plummet the depths of your internal world. I revel in the fact that human emotion, intuition and pure artistic talent can trump science any day of the week. But, hey, don’t take my word for it. There’s a fascinating story of how Umami – the fifth taste – was discovered.
While sitting at a CEO Panel discussion to a group of young professionals this morning, I was reminded once again: Learning begins when you start *living* your life. So what tastes good? Well, the immersion into my own experience, my own feelings, my own desires.
What about you? How have you immersed in your own life? What does full engagement look like to you? I’m so sure that your own prescriptive is unique!
Update June 9, 2010: I found a wonderful article on HuffPo that discusses emotions from a Buddhist perspective. Good read.
I'm Jenny Ferry. I help people dial up their desire, light a bonfire under their 'extenuating circumstances' and lead extravagantly turned {on} lives. Because when you know what you want, and ask for it, you rewrite your whole story.
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Thanks for this, Jenny! I can relate to much of what you’ve described here… especially as someone who’s moved around 30 times (so far) in this life. To answer your question, I immerse into my own life mostly through yoga and meditation — which are, to be clear, two separate things. My yoga practice is my main connection to myself. It helps me take care of my physical body, express my energy, and literally exhaust myself and my thoughts, so that the meditation practice that follows has space to flow. Pretty cool. I also engage by connecting with others and exchanging stories — not just successes, but failures, weekly events, and details of life (what have we each had for lunch? what books are we reading?). Congrats on completing the big move and best of luck as you continue to define your new path. Transition is a living concept, fluid and groundless, often elusive. It also has this funny way of cleansing every crevice, finding the tiny spaces that are so hard to reach that they stay dusty. Change can change all of that. Let it. Let it wash over you like water.
Thank YOU, Kelly, for adding another dimension of depth here. Your words of wisdom ring true: transition is dynamic and cathartic. I feel as if it’s stripped away layers of old varnish to reveal the purity of the organic me – an awareness of the comfort & security within myself that is whole & loving. I’m discovering the power of simply allowing this purification to happen. And if I understand you correctly, as a dedicated nomad, you’ve experienced your own sense of coming home to yourself through your yoga & meditation practice. Right on!
Thanks for this post, Jenny! What a great reminder to really immerse in our lives. For me, full engagement stems from my state of consciousness; more specifically, from a state of appreciation for the small expressions of beauty all around me. On another note, I’m wishing you all the best with your relocation to Phoenix. Moving can be exhausting, but I know you’ll emerge shining!
Jenny–
I found myself captivated by your writing–I, too, feel that same paradox of craving, thriving on, desiring intense human connection…..yet at the same time, I don’t allow myself to get too close, whether it’s a function of some underlying subconscious effort or the simple nature of my being. Like you, I’m not one to cry…I’m fairly easy-going…laid back…and don’t wear my emotions on my sleeve. You’ve certainly made me think this morning, my dear!
Thank you for so openly sharing yourself.
You’re so welcome, Ann, and thanks for the well wishes! And, you nailed it! What a perfect segue into my latest post, “another story” on appreciation. Love the synchronicity. I’ve been thinking about you and hope you are soaking in all the best that the Viennese have to offer, my dear!
Oh, Ash, you ROCK MY WORLD, girlfriend! Thank you for your kind words. And you know what? I am *thrilled* to learn about the awesomesauce that is YOUR life, including the upcoming WBSQ project!!! Phoenix. July. You & me (& the other unconventional rockers…) I’m totally down with it. xoxox